Raymond Ibrahim

CBN News Contributor, Middle East and Islam Expert


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Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

Often translated as “Loyalty and Enmity,” the little-known Islamic doctrine of wala’ wa bara’ commands Muslims never to befriend or be loyal to non-Muslims, while being clean of, disavowing and ultimately hating them.

During a question-and-answer session at an Islamic conference (see video below), the full extent of this divisive doctrine was given full expression. Popular preacher Dr. Yassir Burhami, the vice president of the Salafi party in Egypt, explained how this doctrine must be upheld at all times—even with a Muslim’s wife, if she happens to be a non-Muslim member of the “People of the Book,” (Christians and Jews, whom Muslim males are permitted to marry from; conversely, male Christians and Jews are strictly banned from marrying Muslim females).

When an attendee asked Burhami how Islam can allow a Muslim man to marry a non-Muslim woman and yet expect him to hate her, the sheikh responded as follows:

Where’s the objection? Do all men love their wives? How many married couples live together despite disagreements and problems? Huh? That being the case, he [Muslim husband] may love the way she [non-Muslim woman] looks, or love the way she raises the children, or love that she has money. This is why he’s discouraged from marrying among the People of the Book—because she has no [real] religion. He is ordered to make her hate her religion while continuing marriage/sexual relations with her. This is a very standard matter…. Of course he should tell her that he hates her religion. He must show her that he hates her because of her religion, and because she is an infidel. But if possible, treat her well—perhaps that will cause her to convert to Islam. He should invite her to Islam and call her to Allah.

Dr. Burhami further used the example of rape as an analogy:

In fact, let me tell you: whoever rapes a woman, does he necessarily love her? Or is he just sleeping with her? He’s sleeping with her for her body’s sake only, and he does not love her in reality, because if he loved her, he wouldn’t have hurt her. Therefore it is possible to have sexual relations [between a Muslim man and a Christian or Jewish woman] without love. This is possible, but as we said, he is commanded to hate her.

Next, Burhami exonerated infidel-wife-hating by quoting the Koran verses that form the cornerstone of the doctrine of Loyalty and Enmity:

Otherwise what do you do with the undisputed texts [of the Koran], such as “Thou wilt not find any people who believe in Allah and the Last Day, loving those who resist Allah and His Messenger, even though they were their fathers or their sons, or their brothers, or their kindred… “O ye who believe! take not the Jews and the Christians for your friends and protectors…” [Koran 58:22 and 5:51, Yusuf Ali translation]. What do you do with such a verse? What do you do will all these verses?

Indeed, “what do you do with all these verses?”

This is the crux of the problem between so-called Islamists and so-called moderates: Islamic scriptures—like “all these verses” quoted by Burhami—often side with the “radical” (and intolerant, and hostile, and violent, and supremacist) worldview of the Islamists, leaving the moderates without much of a leg to stand on in the realm of Islamic exegesis.

When asked if a Muslim husband can at least greet his wife—according to Islam’s prophet, Muslims are not permitted to offer greetings to non-Muslims—Burhami was consistent:

When he [Muslim husband] comes home, he should not be the first to greet her. He may greet his children [because they are Muslim] or he can offer a general greeting if any other Muslims are present, meaning them by it [but allowing her to think it’s for her]. These are mainstream commands… She has to begin with greeting him, and then he may respond.

If this is how Islam expects the Muslim to treat his non-Muslim wife, simply because she is an “infidel,” how must it expect him to feel about non-Muslim strangers—like the majority of you reading this?

Not that you’d know it, thanks to another of Islam’s complementary teachings: taqiyya.

Note: To learn more about wala’ wa bara’, see Al-Qaeda leader Ayman Zawahiri’s seminal essay titled “Loyalty and Enmity”—nearly 60 pages worth—which I annotated and translated years back in The Al Qaeda Reader (pgs. 63-115).

Print     Email to a Friend    posted on Wednesday, September 18, 2013 11:08 AM

Comments on this post

# RE: Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

In a word "RUBBISH"! How many Muslim wives out working on a job and taking care of a home? Get your facts straight, don't judge the many by the actions of a few radicals.
Left by Guy Betz on Sep 18, 2013 1:06 PM

# RE: Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

So in a highly conservative Muslim marriage, this is what the non-Muslim wife can expect. Certainly this will be discussed during the courting phase of the relationship. If the two agree, then let them come together. If the two do not agree, then let them go their separate ways. Christians refer to this as being unevenly yoked. John 16:13 However,when He,the Spirit of truth,has come,He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority,but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come. Galatians 5:25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Romans 8:16 The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God. Psalm 51:11 Do not put me away from before you, or take your holy spirit from me. 2Ch 16:9 For the eyes of Jehovah run to and fro in all the whole earth to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose heart is perfect toward Him.
Left by wrhalver on Sep 19, 2013 5:28 AM

# RE: Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

Thank you, Guy! What is going on with the dishonest title of this article? And come on now...how many Al Qaeda members have non-Muslim wives in the first place? Looks to me like somebody's book sales are way down, and he's hoping to remedy that by stirring up a little fear and bigotry. If he can't make his point without lying, though, then it's obviously not a point worth making, nor a book worth reading.
Left by Magda on Sep 19, 2013 2:18 PM

# RE: Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

This Religion is staying to form. Full of discord, unharmony, and stresses how to treat a sife who is a non-Muslim. She is crazy to marry a Muslim man in the first palce. And I would almost guarentee that he lied to her to get her to agree to marry him. No woman wold ever marry a man that she knew did not love her and is mandated to hate her and treat her as less than she deserves. Nothing this Religion calls for astounds me anymore, I have heard it all. From the beheading laws, to the beating your wife laws. No woman would want to raise children, willingly, in a home that has such mandates. The Muslim women today do not realize that, there is a life that is good to a woman in the world. That they do have a choice on how to raise their children. And that there is a God that loves them, and men out here that would cherish them and treat them as a real woman.
Left by bygrace on Sep 19, 2013 2:41 PM

# RE: Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

This how Muslim treats non Muslim? Is this a Religion of Peace? which all Muslim say to the Non Muslim all the time!

Left by JN on Sep 19, 2013 7:10 PM

# RE: Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

No surprise as Islam is founded on the hate and murder clearly commanded throughout the Quran.
Left by Anonymous on Sep 19, 2013 8:34 PM

# RE: Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

That is why my daughter divorced her muslim husband. she met him and he treated her like a queen until they married then about 6 months later he began to beat her and talk horribly to her all the while acting like this perfect gentleman but the bruises told a totally opposite story.
Left by jackie on Sep 20, 2013 5:43 PM

# RE: Muslim Husbands Must Hate Non-Muslim Wives

I agree with Jackie's comment. I can testify to the treatment and hate, I myself received from my Muslim ex-husband. Yes he did treat me well while we were dating, only to get me to fall for him and his lies. 3 months after we were married, my ex started to verbally, emotionally and physically abuse me.It lasted for 10 months. According to his family: "I was to take whatever the husband would dish out towards me with out objection... because now I was his property, servant and sexual object & never to deny him his "spousal rights".
So, he was arrested and charged with 10 counts of tumultuous assault. for He served 3 days in Jail and he was punished and investigated by the INS.
For those who have think that Mr. Ibrahim's sarticle is exaggerated, think again.
Left by Agape on Sep 21, 2013 12:29 PM