March 2011 Entries
In 1999, I was hosting a late night network television show discussing the catalog cover of Abercrombie & Fitch that featured a naked girl lying face up on the back of a horse. Over a decade ago, this retailer pushed the boundary of sensibility and continues to do so today. As a parent, I was so outraged I banned our family from buying merchandise from the store. The ban continues.
Suddenly there is a stranger sharing the bathroom, giving directions and checking your homework. Mom or dad is no longer exclusively yours. One parent’s daily presence is lost. Holidays become complicated. And what do you call this new person who shows up at the breakfast table with habits that annoy you? From the child’s point of view, blending a family is no easy task.
When Charlie Sheen’s rants and raves in the media, it highlights a little bit of what it is like to be in relationship with a narcissist. People who have Narcissistic Personality Disorder have an exaggerated sense of their own self-importance, making them difficult to deal with in families. You might experience them as conceited or obsessed with their own brilliance, wealth, ideal love, beauty, etc.
Last week, I told you about the contest I have going on to get a free copy of my latest book release. To win, entrants must complete the sentence, “I love my mother, but…”. The responses have been moving, heart felt and incredibly honest and telling. While many of you are creating healthy connections with your moms, others are stuck or have been seriously wounded by this important relationship.
How would you finish this sentence, “I love my mother, but…”? I asked women to email me their responses and what I found did not surprise me. I received everything from “but…she is controlling, critical, abusive, never there for me...” to “she is an example of grace, my best friend....” Let’s face it. When it comes to mother-daughter relationships, it gets complicated.