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If I could just stop drinking soda, I think it would help.

mmiller, you can stop drinking soda! I would have you focus on ONLY that change for now, just replace the soda you drink with water. Do it for 21 days and you will believe that you can live without it forever!

ONE soft drink a day puts (keeps!) 15 pounds a year on the body (1 8 oz soda!) Realize that doing without them, increasing water intake and gradually changing your other habits will lead to weight loss over time, and substaintial weight loss if you consume a lot of them now!

I would like to be healthier and confident. In 2002 almost 7 yrs ago I had bariatric bypass surgery. I lost over 160lbs and felt great but looked so peeked and so much skin was hanging that I think subconsciously I preferred being fat because during nursing school (2yrs) I have put back on about 60lbs. I am still much thinner than I was but not nearly as healthy. Now that I have finished school and am looking for work, I have the time to walk and to eat healthier, but I find it easier to not eat and all that does is lower my metabolism.

I know this, I know how I should eat, but I feel like what is the use I failed even with the miracle of surgery. I found also that because I am a survivor that I think when I started getting attention from all the men except my husband, it frightened me and my weight became a barrier earlier in my life to ward off negative attention from men.

So, my goal is to figure out how to feel safe and start again, so that I can be healthier and more confident(safe).

rgaylord, what specifically did you go back to eating regularly that put the 60 pounds back on?

IF there is a specific food--that's your #1 vice that you need to bust! IF you are eating too large of portions, that's your vice! IF you are eating outside of meal times, THAT's your vice.....

You need to identify ONE change that would make a big difference and focus on fixing that one thing for now. And, you did NOT fail at the surgery, you are down 100 pounds! you are fine, and now just need to get even better!

Ms. Havey
Thank You for your uplifting words. I first went to answer you and at first, I began to write back in a defensive manner, running down what I ate and I realized... (The posting couldn't post due to maintenance)...I had been lying to myself. Yes, my main food staple is a plain bean burrito(beans straight from can, 1 slice of cheese on a small tortilla), but I had to take inventory and realized I eat more than I perceived. This along with no water or exercise and put it all together and one would have 60lbs in 2 years. I went back and took inventory on what I have eaten in this past week and realize I have eaten aprox 1500 per day, but they are filled with fat, and salt. So thanks for helping me take a closer look!! But which thing should I address first... water, exercise, or diet? Thanks and God Bless YOU!!

rgaylord, I am SO sorry for the very long delay in answering you!

WATER! I know it helps cut appetite, makes you feel more full and really makes one feel better--more empowered because they "Can" do this one thing. It is always the best place to start and to reaffirm what one is working one if you stumble and need to "get started" again!

Glad you saw past defenses to uncover some of your core "vices"!

My vice is my portions - which are bigger than what they should be. Also - I am an emotional eater. I have been under a lot of stress for a long period of time and I get to the point that I don't care anymore. There is so much going on right now and food is the only comfort and sure thing I can count on. My first goal is to watch my portions.

I'd like to have a person to pray with and be accountable to through email or a blog to overcome the turning to food instead of turning to the Lord issue. Eating healthier! Moving! Could we do this here?

Godizgood, yes you can email me, Julia at JuliaHavey.com or blog comment here and I would love to pray with you and hold you accountable!

We could start a weekly prayer where we all pray for each other to make healthier choices in the coming week and to have God's help to avoid our vices and move towards a healthier life.